My Christmas Gift: I'm Licensed! 12/21/11

One week before Christmas I got an email saying that my trainer suddenly has 3 open days I can drive. As it turns out she chose not to take a week of her vacation.  Since I don't check my personal email until after work, Monday was already over.  I only had 2 days left to try this again. I got on the phone with the DMV the first thing Tuesday morning to schedule my 3rd road test. They had no openings Tuesday, so I asked about Wednesday.  They only had one morning and one afternoon appointment left open. Knowing it was supposed to rain over night and well into the morning I took the 1:45 pm appointment. I called my trainer to let her know what time to get me to the DMV and everything was set. But things would not go as planned.


I awoke Wednesday morning to some torrential rain and a boat load of fog. My bus driver commented that it looked really spooky out that morning. She was right, we passed a two story home decorated for Christmas with candles in the windows.  It did look creepy against the dark rain filled morning sky soaked with thick rolling fog. I was not happy. This was my second to last day of work before Christmas vacation.  I had my plate extremely FULL of things to do that day at work and at home. I tried to not think much about my test, but I did find myself looking at the radar on my breaks. I saw a break in the rain on radar at about 11am. I was by no means excited because I had no clue how long this window of no rain would actually last.  By the time 1:00 came I walked outside and the concrete showed the rain was drying up and the clouds had gotten much lighter.  I was running late, so we drove straight to the DMV with no practice.  I was still shaken from my work day and making stupid mistakes, like turning the car off without putting the car in park and hitting the wrong blinker by accident.  There were just the kind of little things that may cause me to fail yet again.  This kinda of behavior before my test made me doubt myself more.


Once we stepped out of the car at the DMV the clouds all broke, the sun came out and cool clean air swept across the sky like a late October day in the South.  I was elated that now they could not cancel my road test due to rain.  Now I just wondered how the sun would effect my test drive.  The DMV was full of people and teens out of school trying to get their license.  A Department of Corrections officer greeted me, and when she did not know what a bioptic driver was, she called to her supervisor for help.  I've never seen the DMV supervisor before.  She was a lady between 40 to 50 with glasses and a can do attitude that could be addictive.  She read all my documentation, and told me shed come over to do the interview too.  They took yet another photo, asked me the health questions, did the eye test, and had me sign a statement.  After that, it was time to hit the road once again.  I hoped I did not get Mrs. Brown, unless she displayed a more friendly demeanor.  Today since the teens were out of school, the line to get the road test was long.  About 5 cars were ahead of me.  So we waited as my trainer happily worked on her ipad.  It was really cool to witness this one teen and his family interact at the very moment he got his license.  He was with his older teen brother and his father.  He hopped out of the car with the safety officer and high fived his brother as he joyfully claimed his success with a laughter, pride, and a smile that said it all.  I watched as we got closer and closer to the front of the line trying to figure out who was going to test me.  Finally I made it to the front of the line and officer Jones approached my vehicle.


He was the officer who gave me my first road test. Because he had shown interest in my bioptics, and actually talked to my trainer when I failed, I felt like this was a good thing.  He is a no nonsense guy, but that's likely part of his job description.  The other safety officer I tested with the second day was subtly brazen.  So the differences were vast.  My trainer seemed over anxious to exclaim to officer Jones how happy she was we got him again.  I was over there sinking down in my seat thinking, please don't say anything to him that will accidentally jinx this for me.  She had told me not to mention the second test, yet she didn't mind revisiting the first.  He definitely remembered me, a good or bad thing, I don't know.  Regardless, I was now officially nervous when he got in the car.  We again tested signals, emergency break, and horn.  After he put all the data in his electric pad he said to proceed when ready following all the normal rules of the road that I'd follow if I was alone.  He asked if I had any questions.  I asked him if I could creep up after I stop at a stop sign to safely see around corners before jumping out into the road.  He then shocked me a little, because instead of answering me, he turned my one question around on me and said, "What does the State Drivers Handbook say about that?"  My mind spun and I stumbled my way out of my own questions with an acceptable answer.



After that, I put the car in drive and we were off.  He took me on the same exact route.  I nailed the 3 point turn, I nailed backing up the car.  I saw all the stop signs timely.  The sun was shining and this was going fast.  Now on to the road that connected to the stop light that caused me to fail last time.  No 18 wheelers today.  When I approached the light was red, so I had to stop.  I fumbled for my turning signal and turned the wrong one on for a split second, but I very quickly corrected myself hoping he didn't notice.  I told the officer what a long light this was hoping he'd forget if he did happen to see me fumble.  Now I was worried about my slight signal fumble.  Once the light lit up green I wasted no time turning and increased my speed as he reminded me to do on my first test.  Now the trick was to not miss the turn that proved obscure during my first test.  I practiced it, and made sure I had some landmarks in mind so I'd not miss it accidentally.  I made sure to slow down for the turn, but not to a crawl.  I made the turn a little fast, but certainly not dangerously fast like the first time.  At least there was no question I saw it this time.  Now for the final touches.


I crawled to a stop sign trying my best to make sure my vehicle's front end was not a hair past the front of the stop sign.  There was no white line on the road so you must judge your stopping distance by insuring your front end does not stick out further than the pole of the stop sign.  Next I turned my blinker on and then had to judge the traffic flow.  We had traffic coming both ways.  I waited very cautiously until it was clear and turned left.  Almost home.  Next stop was to turn right into this HUGE pothole filled with water.  I mentioned to officer Jones how the drivers must have worn this turn out because I was having to ride a little off the road because the road was crumbled so bad.  I wanted to ensure I didn't hit the vehicle turning out on the lane to the right of me.  I crawled through the pothole and he told me to take my next right, which was the DMV parking lot.  Now I just have to navigate the yellow lines and turn the sharp roundabout without hitting a cone.  He then told me to bring the car to a stop and put the car in park. It was done.  Now for the results.


I had no real expectations after failing it twice and me fumbling my blinker and turning a tad fast.  Any little thing could be detrimental.  He was silent for some painstaking seconds.  He then said "well.....congratulations, you passed."  I went into a silent disbelief/elation.  I tried to play it cool, and just said "thank you".  He went on to tell me I made a 96 score!  I then immediately asked what lowered my score.  He indicated he did not really see me completely yield at the yield sign located at the very beginning of the course.  Next, he said that it may be due to my thick red filters, but he really did not notice a lot of eye movement from mirror to mirror.  And finally the third thing was that when he asked me to come to a quick stop, he did not see me look in my rear view mirror to ensure no one was closely following me.  Aside from that, he said I did exceptionally well.  He told me to take the small score paper inside to the clerk and they would issue my license.  As soon as he opened the car door my trainer who had been anxiously awaiting my return, asked officer Jones how I did.  He told her I passed, she squealed with delight and laughter and he relayed how improved my driving was.  I now felt like a million bucks.  Onward to the clerks desk.


As I approached the desk I realized that just like that teen I saw, no one was going to be able to wipe this huge smile off my face either!  I was beaming with excitement and shock that I finally reached my goal.  The clerk asked what I was there for and I told her I had just passed my test.  She was very nice and congratulated me and asked for the score paper.  Without any prompting she glanced at my score and said, " you did very well, we don't see many scores this high here."  Now she really had me smiling.  I told her thanks and that I had waited around 33 years for this day to come.  She said "well you did it."  She had me fill out some paperwork and after a few computer entries asked me to check all the information on it very carefully and then sign it.  I saw my name, address, date of birth,and license number etc. on it.  This all seemed correct.  With that I signed and then she printed me a paper license and told me the plastic license will arrive in the mail within about 2 weeks.  She said the paper license is just as valid as the plastic one would be.  That meant no delay on me testing my new driving legs!   I was elated.  I thanked her again and with a great caring smile she wished me well.  As I started to walk out my trainer asked to see my license, I showed her.  She told me that we have a problem.  You've got to be kidding me I thought, what now?


She noticed that it did not say "bioptic driver" in a certain area of the back of my license.  She indicated that the state Safety board in Montgomery forced people to pay for a new license when this data was missing to correct this critical error.  My trainer said we should get back to the clerk's desk as quickly as possible to resolve this before someone else was waited on.  I darted through that place like a mad man, and we both skid into her desk.  My trainer did all the talking to explain what was required to be on my license to make the state safety department was happy.  I apologized to the clerk for signing the form when it was incorrect, but told her I just had no way of knowing what the state needed on that card.  She was really patient and said "you've waited this long, I'm sure we can straighten this out, it's not a problem."  She had to redo my photo to redo the computer license.  No way around that apparently.  How many times do you get a do over drivers license photo opportunity? I did my best GQ and anxiously awaited the new printout to sign.  She had to have someone else more familiar with bioptic drivers give her a helping hand in the computer to fill out the miscellaneous boxes to show I'm a bioptic driver.  Once they worked together to straighten that out, I signed the newest license and she printed out the paper version yet again.  After that, I thanked her again for working with me to resolve the unforeseen mistake.  She said she was glad she could take care of it and wished me congratulations again.  With that I was out of the DMV.  And this time, walking out for the first time as a licensed bioptic driver! 


I couldn't wait to tell my family.  None of it was sinking in really.  I was not overly ecstatic because I didn't even think I'd get to test this particular day.  That made it all so much sweeter.  The more I thought about it the happier I got.  I drove all over town with my trainer that day taking in some last minute tips.  We had fun and I enjoyed finally having a reason to celebrate.  My journey to this moment started February 19th, 2009 and my goal was reached December 21st, 2011.  Friends, that's 2 years 10 months and 2 days of blood, sweat and tears!  Don't give up on your dreams.  If you're a bioptic candidate reading this, don't freak out either, lol.  The time from start to finish depends greatly on your eye condition, your prior experience with a car, and your personal support system during training.  None of these 3 elements worked in my favor.  My eye problem was complicated by not only problems seeing at a distance, but by extreme light sensitivity and my color blindness.  I had no experience with a car, because neither of my parents could see well enough to drive.  I had no real home training support system, because I lived away from family and my best friends understandably did not want to risk me wrecking their only means of transportation during practice.  I'm sure they also did not care to have the insurance hiked up if I unexpectedly wrecked their car.  To those few who did take this chance; I profoundly thank you for being brave enough to take a few risk for me!

I had days where I wondered if I should be doing this.  I had days when I thought it would never end.  But I learned to chant this in my head "just put one foot in front of the other."  That's what I've been doing over the last 3 years.  I'm so happy that my work finally paid off!  Let me tell you, driving that car is still scary because of the unknown factor but the fun now greatly outweighs the anxiety factor.  I have so much fun driving.  It's just unexplainable to those who have never really had to experience a substantial period of time without the ability to drive.  So what will I do now?  Well I'm going car shopping of course!  I'm sure you'll be involved in that and I welcome your opinions and financial support. lol  Every little bit helps.  Just kidding.  But man, what a great Christmas!  Thanks for following my journey.  I'll write again as the car search takes shape at the beginning of next year.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Nearing The Finish Line 09/22/11

The past few weeks have been filled with interesting driving news.  One major thing that happened over the last few months was that my Rehabilitation specialist gave me a deadline upon which all my driving lessons would cease.  They were no longer interested in my learning, but seemed to want to pull the rug out from under me due to business pressures and budget constraints.   The deadline was August 31st.  So a few weeks ago, I received a "urgent' email from my Rehabilitation specialist asking me to call immediately.  I did so expecting to get the axe.  Instead, I was shocked to hear the opposite; they had arranged for me to complete my lessons with my current driving trainer.  Even better, they were working on a new way to expedite lessons by using a different set of trainers.  I was elated that I was not being cut off.  One anxious email turned into a real blessing.  I was so relieved, because I know this whole situation is out of my hands. 

My driving instructor and the Rehabilitation office have continued a internal dispute that could very well effect their clients.  While I'm thrilled I'm not yet a casualty in their war, I'm praying no other innocent person is either.  It seems to me the current debt our state and country is in, has really brought out the worst in people.  You just never know what's around the corner, so you better live for today.

This week has brought around a great opportunity for me to drive!  A week off work!  I'm elated.  Yesterday was my first day out in over a month and let me tell you it was a "gully washer" as the old folks say.  So I got in some excellent drive time and experience in the rain.  The rain made the yellow and orange lines harder to see, but hey, lets face it, they were already about worn off the pavement in certain parts of town anyways.  I loved the ease of using the windshield wipers on our new training vehicle.  The cloudy day proved a easy drive for me.  Then I heard some words come out of Jennifer's mouth that made me sit back and pause.

She said, "If you do well this week, what do you think about getting your license?"  I personally think it's time, but hearing her actually say it outloud was music to my ears.  Then some doubt hit me and I thought to myself....is this enough?  Will it ever be enough?  I'm not 100% confident yet....so should I really be driving alone now?  I guess these are legitimate questions, but oddly enough even thought I want my training to end, I had not really thought about NOW as being a true ending to my training.  I guess it's went on so long I stopped looking for an ending so my hopes would not get dashed.  Then I couldn't help but wonder if this had to do with me or with my driving trainer's dispute with my friends at Rehabilitation.   Hmmmm.....it could be both!  Regardless, at some point you have to spread  your wings and fly, and make your own mistakes and learn from them.....hopefully without breaking or damaging yourself or your vehicle.  :)  So my mind has started racing with ALL the things that I will need to do AFTER I get my license and where I'll get THE MONEY to pay for it.  lol 

Today's drive had it's good and bad things.  Let me tell you the bad stuff first,  I went form a two way to a four way street and turned into the wrong lane.  I got confused some about what "outermost" is.  Why should we still have to use such a antiquated word anyway?  Who says that?  Pierce Morgan?  Anyways, this happened not once, but twice in a area I normally have no problem with.  I think it's simply because it's been so long since I've traveled there I have forgot what turns I previously had memorized.  Well enough of the bad stuff, now on to the good stuff.

My trainer asked me to practice parallel parking today, which I think we've only done once, maybe even twice before.  Today we drove to downtown, she pointed out a spot, and man I nailed it the VERY FIRST TRY!!!  I was so elated I told her I had to get out and see it.  She made fun of me because my mirrors should have been proof enough.  But the mirror distortions don't offer me the satisfaction I wanted to see.  So I got out the car and examined my handy-work.  WOW  Just amazing, I probably couldn't do it again that easily with anyone else....but here's hoping.  haha

The second thing I did was work on my 3 point turns.  This is a piece of cake to me now, almost a joke.  Nothing to work on really and that made me and my trainer happy.  But along today's journey two other notable things happened.  First of all, when I was downtown, not one but two pedestrians on two separate occasions walked out in front of my moving vehicle even though I had a green light.  Now what exactly is this all about?  Death wish?  Ignorance?  Dysfunctional "do not walk" signs.  I don't know, but it's a good thing they scurried backwards and realized the error of their ways, because this foolishness had nothing to do with my driving at all.  In addition to this added surprise element, there was new work being done on the sewer just a few blocks up from my residence.  Oh the joys of this interesting dilemma.

Let me paint you a picture.  The road I'm traveling on is a two way road and of course I'm traveling North on the right side of the road, when all of the sudden a see a diamond sign indicating road work ahead and to exercise extreme caution.  So I slowed down and notice the cones got closer to me.  Soon I man holding  a "STOP" sign came into view.  So I obeyed his sign.  He motioned for the other traffic to continue to flow through on my left.  Then after what seemed like forever, he switched his hand held sign around to say "SLOW" on the other side.  So i went into the incoming traffic lane to my left to follow his direction around all the sewage work until I got back in my normal lane safely.  Don't you just love these unexpected surprises?  It was a small inconvenience that we went through twice for training purposes.  Usually guys just motioning me forward has been my prior experience with these things.  So naturally, I was delighted to see the use of actual signs.  If you're anything like me you suck at reading lips and looking at questionable hand signals on the road...well not those hand signals!  :) 

So tomorrow will be my last day training this week.  I hope we can iron a few things out, but I feel confident it will go well and I'll be very very close to getting my license in the coming weeks.  How soon I purchase a car, and what I purchase is a WHOLE OTHER story.  I welcome your suggestions on this issue.  Here's a brief rundown of things I'd like.  I know I won't get them all.  Let me know what you think.

1. Excellent view out back window of vehicle.
2. No tint on vehicle (my red filters on top of extra tint make seeing too difficult)
3. I'd love a HUD, heads up display showing digital speed.  (I can't see normal speedometer needles at all hardly, but hear GPS could help in this arena.)
4. I want good gas mileage.
5. I don't want a coupe, I want a four door vehicle. (truck or car or van)
6. I love riding high and feel more in control of the road.
7. I don't want to pay a ton of money for a first vehicle.
8. I want it to have good reviews and safety ratings.

2 Good Weeks of Driving...Check: 08/04/11

The past few weeks have been some of the best continuous driving training times I've had in a long time.  The frequency of my practice has certainly enhanced my driving skills.  Something I'm happy to say is that I finally think I've mastered lane changes on the freeway!  Although, I still don't like it when the lane suddenly ends and you're forced to get over.  If you must come to a complete stop, as I did the other day, you may even have a person behind you honking because you don't feel comfortable pulling out at the moment they would prefer you to.  I'm sure some of you are experts in this arena, so feel free to share.

Some other improvements are in:

1. Three point turns
2. Backing out of spaces
3. Parking between cars.
4. Navigating parking garages
5. Not pushing breaks on freeway (just letting off gas instead)
6. Better understanding of right of way
7. Going through a drive though and car wash.
8. Navigating a round-a-bout.
9. Using mirrors.
10. Turning around to check blind spots, while keeping wheel steady and not slowing speed.

We plan to tackle parallel parking one more time in the near future.  I've done it twice, and I think it's not complicated, it just takes patience, and some skill in turning the care the perfect distance at the perfect moment.

The Commute: 03/30/10

Long time no blog update right?  Sorry.  Just nothing to tell.  My trainer's schedule is usually busy.  One day we had tentatively set, we both forgot by the time it arrived.  The next week Jennifer took vacation.  All of this and a lot of rain have led to it being a month between lessons.  So we finally agreed on last Tuesday, 03/30/10.  Before I even met her that day trouble tried to inch its way into my plans.


I was at work, engulfed in my research, yet thinking I wanted to have things better prepared so I did not waste a moments time driving today.  I made sure my bioptics were in working order and clean of dust.  I kept looking at the clock consistently making sure to try and get downstairs a little earlier then my 12:00 appointment.  I made sure to put my contacts on, instead of wearing eye glasses.  I looked at my phone to ensure it was charged and checked for missed calls.  Despite all these efforts a sudden streak of terror ran through my mind.  I realized I left my wallet at home with my drivers permit in it.  I couldn't drive today.  I thought about just not telling Jennifer I left my permit at home.  The repercussions of that lie far outweighed the benefits.  If I wrecked that car with no permit on my person, I may never have a chance to drive again.   I couldn't believe this.  I was going to have to call Jennifer 30 minutes before my oh so belated appointment and tell her that I couldn't go today because of my carelessness!  I sat thinking about calling her and suddenly remembered something.  The day before, I put my wallet in my lunchbox because my pants pockets were so small and shallow.  Could it still be in there?  I swirled my rolling chair around to my lunchbox as fast as I could.  Like a mad man looking for treasure I snatched my lunchbox up off my desk.  Then I glanced into the side zipper pocket.  There sat my wallet with my permit and everything else in tact.  Whew...I did not have to cancel after all.  Shortly thereafter Jennifer called and said she was outside.  She still beat her own appointment time, so I wasn't downstairs yet.  I wanted to do this during my lunch break today so I did not have to take time off work.


Jennifer jumped out of the car after she saw me and got in the passenger seat.  I was a little shocked she was going to make me drive downtown again at the beginning of this trip.  Today, unlike my first drive, was a extremely bright sunny day.  Translation: it was hellacious for me to see outside.  However with the red filters. things really were better, just not as good as a cloudy day would have provided.  I hopped in and remembered to put my seatbelt on, to turn the mirrors so I could see and to put the dark blanket on the dash.  I had memorized the gear order.  I put my left foot back so I would not be tempted to use it at all.  Jennifer was not satisfied with my right leg angle to the break and gas pedals.  She watched me move up closer to the wheel till she was satisfied.  According to the wikiHow website your leg should be at a 120 degree angle when driving.  After Jennifer got done texting, I shifted gears to roll out to the main street.  I had to ask her which way to go.


As soon as I had that out of my mouth she reminded me to turn my blinker on.  I did it wrong.  Those poor confused drivers behind me.  lol  I struggled with remembering if pushing it up was for the left or down was for the right or the opposite.  I need a rhyme to remember them by or something stupid that will stick.  If you have any suggestions please let me know.  We hit the main road and she reminded me of the one way streets.  I made the turn but Jenn held the wheel some to ensure I would not turn into anyone else's lane.  I was doing good seeing the red lights for the most part.  Seeing the stop signs with the red filters proved to be a challenge.  Lucky for me, this particular road showed the word "STOP" painted on the ground which proved most helpful.  Regardless, I was still very observant before crossing ANY street.  Jennifer ended up telling me she was training 5 people.  I''m sitting here wondering how in the world that utilized all of her day unless they are doing much more training then I am.  Anyways, before I knew it we were.....well....'Where are we?"  I laughed out loud.  I was SO busy concentrating on staying in my lane, seeing red and green lights, doing lane changes, turning on the correct blinker, hitting the gas very lightly, and listening to Jennifer's instructions....that I had NO CLUE where we were.  After she told me, I began to pay attention to my surroundings more and figured it out.  We came the back way to my house.  This involved some extremely curvy streets.  I was so excited.  I told her one thing I was thinking.  It seemed much easier for me to stay in my lane then I ever thought it would be.  That was a big difference from what I assumed while observing others drive and actually driving myself.  I always thought it looked so daunting to have to keep moving that wheel left and right.  But it became no biggie for me personally.  Jennifer immediately exclaimed she was glad I was so good at it because she recently had a nightmare about one of her other pupils who veers into other lanes much too often.  Can you imagine how many nightmares you'd have about driving if you took legally blind people out on the road daily?  She's definitely got nerves of steel.  Maybe her keen ability to listen to PRM radio nonstop enhanced that gift.  


Well before I knew it we were coming toward my apartments!  Wow, I had driven myself home.  She instructed me to park and I couldn't even see the lines at all.  They desperately need repainting.  Regardless,  I was lucky enough to pull in to her satisfaction.  Ok, now time to back out.  I started backing out, but turned and looked first.  I was starting to turn the wheel toward where I wanted the car to curve out, but she stopped me.  I was told to pull out straight and then when almost all the way in the street to start to curve the car back.  That seemed easy enough, but there were no cars around to hit either.  I managed to shift the gears correctly back to drive.  Now we were off to work again.  Then the shocker came.


She told me to take the "expressway" back.  OK I barely was comfortable going 30, taking the expressway.....was she crazy!???  It was good to get this experience because near my home there's this really crazy intersection where about 6 streets all meet in one location.  Oh yes, I'm lucky enough to get to navigate that mess every day.  First of all, the traffic was really busy and I had to get the guts up to dart out in front of traffic after being sure I had the all clear in both directions.  There was no light at this juncture.  I did dart out fast...too fast.  Had she not grabbed the wheel I could have darted straight into the ditch.  So onto the expressway we crept.  I approached this huge curve where you merge into expressway traffic.  My foot instinctively let off the gas as I turned the curve.  She told me not to because I had to be moving fast on the freeway.  Ok, be careful what you wish for.  


Before I knew it she had grabbed the wheel acting as my eyes helping me change lanes.  It did seem a little much and she said we'd focus on lane changes later, but for now she'd do all that.  I was kind of in shock at this point because as I glanced to my right I could FEEL this 18 wheeler on the side of us and another car on the left.  I was wedged in.  This all seemed so unreal...even more unreal I WAS THE ONE driving!  I tried my best to keep focused before someone honked because I was going so slow.  We let one person around me.  Then we found a quick route to work.  We did a huge U turn by the hospital and went straight there.  The traffic lights downtown are sideways.  I never seem to see the ones hung sideways going home, just coming to work.  I accidently told Jenn the wrong street my workplace was on.  I keep getting it mixed up because we changed locations recently.  So then some pedestrians cross in front of me.  Crisis avoided, lucky fools.  Then I noticed something else.  The light was green, BUT if I did not stop I was going to hit the car in front of me who had his brake lights on.  I don't know why he had them on.  I think because traffic in front of him moved slowly through the green light.  This made me think that it's more important to look at the car in front of you then the traffic light.  After all the light won't kill you, the cars will.  


We took a right on red and dodged a vendors truck before swerving into my workplace's drop-off area.  I was running late and cut our appointment shorter than Jennifer planned.  She hopped out and agreed to meet me in the coming weeks for more training.  She seemed more comfortable this time.  Hopefully we're building some trust in each other.  My feet hurt after this.  I think I didn't know how to properly rest them WHILE driving.  If you have any tips on this please let me know.  All in all, it was a great trip and as always I learned a lot.  I'm going to need to improve on my blinker knowledge, backing up, and parking abilities before the next drive.  Hopefully I can meet with my boss soon to iron out a driving schedule that can be consistent, yet work for all parties involved.  I'll keep you posted on those developments.   

Shifting Gears!

My Bioptic training has officially shifted gears.  Today it was finally time to for me to sit in the drivers seat.  My appointment was a 1:00 but it ended up being pushed up to a partly sunny Monday at 12:10.  I was so busy at work today I had no time to feel nervous or excited.  But one thing was for sure, I definitely was not forgetting it!  I had been thinking about this day all weekend.  Hoping and praying nothing would mess it up if it's meant to be.  


When I arrived outside Jennifer and I battled my new velcro attachments.  I didn't realize they would make it hard to push the bioptic through my red filter.  (I just put the velcro on today.)  Once that situation was resolved we went to a empty parking lot where the real work would begin.  She asked me if she should assume I know nothing.  I told her I have driven with family a few times in my life, but just assume I knew nothing because it's the truth.   She laughed and we parked.  I got in the drivers seat and she showed me the break, the gas, and the gears.  Then we spent some time adjusting the mirrors electronically.  She got out of the car to demonstrate where my blind spot is and told me to be sure I was not seeing the side of my car in the side mirrors.  Once everything was lined up she showed me how to look at them and said it would be most important when changing lanes.  She then taught me how to backup looking backwards, over my shoulder, to the right.  This seemed awkward.  My neck hated it.  But she and I both knew this would be on the driving test, so I best get used to it.  Her car seems very quiet, you can barely even hear the engine running.  She also did something that may help a lot of drivers.  She put a black cloth over the dashboard to obscure sun reflections.  Nice touch.  


I got a little frustrated that I could not see the gear shifts well at all.   Her car had a stick shift attached to the wheel.  The gear letters are on the dash and have a tiny square that appears around them when selected.  The wheel was at times in the way when not straight and also the gear display was just so tiny on her dark dashboard.  Red filters do not help when trying to read a shadowed, unlit dashboard.  The newer cars have gears like the ones like pictured above, so these are much easier to read.  In fact, I got into a friends car tonight and was delighted with how big everything was and his backlighting and special placing of the speedometer was really awesome.  I love technology.  It was big enough I could see the speed from the passenger seat.  Anyways, on Jennifer's training car, teeny tiny everything.  There are some things you can do to enhance the dash like buying a sheet magnifier and cutting it to fit your dashboard.  See www.maxiaids.com if you're interested.  I will decide if I need one if I ever get my own car depending on the display style.  


After adjusting the mirrors I took the car out of Park and we began to roll forward.  Then she told me to turn.  I immediately brought up the problem I have with using the wheel is not knowing how far to turn it to straighten the wheels back out.  She acknowledged this is something that is not natural that I must get used to.  I also made an instant mistake;  I put my left foot on the break.  WRONG!  She said I better not make her tie my foot down.  She said my left foot will not be useful.  After that, Jennifer showed me how to pivot my right foot from gas to pedal.  I never knew any of this.  I always assumed people used whatever they were comfortable with.  I also never knew until this past week that signs exist just under bridges to let you know what street/bridge you're driving under.  I was then instructed by Jennifer to do a few circles around the parking lot.  Once I was comfortable with that, she instructed me to drive to a parking spot to see how well I could park between the white lines.  I did so, forgot to put the car in park, she reminded me, and got out to assess my accomplishment.  Well no accomplishment here...I failed to line it up.  The car was way to one side and crooked.  With that she got her "doo-dad thingy" out of the truck.  It was something she stuck in the middle of the hood to help me judge my ability to center park.  This bought to my attention that the middle of the car was in fact far to my visual right.  With some practice lining it up visually, it was time to try parking again.  This time I got out to examine my work I was happier with the results.  I was lined perfectly straight with the lines and just a tad too far to the right.  


What next?  I drove around a little more and was now gliding along trying to make sure I stayed on "my side' of the road, not veering from lane to lane.  This seemed to come easy, but then again there was no oncoming traffic to my left I could judge by.  Next she told me to give it some gas.  I did and started going faster then I was comfortable with and began hitting the break.  That was not what I was told to do.  She encouraged me again to let off the break and give it some gas.  I did and again did so apprehensively, slowly and gently.  At this point she pushed my leg down some to force me to go faster.  Sneaky, but effective.  I was still scared.  lol  Good thing I did not know what was going to happen next.  She was pretty happy with my handling of the car and told me to keep driving to the end of the parking lot toward the road.  Then her next words were "I probably shouldn't do this but you're doing so well, why don't we take a right onto that road."  Now I KNEW I'd be sick.


She just told me to take this car into REAL traffic on a REAL used road, in a downtown area with ONE ways and tons of red lights and idiots crossing.  NO WAY.......yep.  We looked for oncoming traffic.  I was so slow to turn my curb I like to have never gotten out of there.  She said most people are going too fast when they turn a curb anyways.  I felt so inadequate being in the midst of the traffic chaos.  But then something happened or didn't happen I should say.  I started driving and didn't run into the other lane.  i did not hit cars parked on the side of the road.  I also ran no red lights and proceeded on green.  I even remembered to brake slowly and learned how to use my turning signals attached to the drivers wheel on the left side.  Wow....I was having an out of body experience almost.  I couldn't grasp what was going on.  She helped me turn the wheel a few times to ensure I did it far and fast enough.  I also managed to stop the correct distance from traffic in front of me.  Well before I knew it we had ran into some construction.  We had to go an alternate route and around all these 18 wheelers parked horizontally in the road.  WHEW  Now this was getting nuts.  I managed to navigate through that with Jennifer's help.  My next challenge was realizing I needed to yield to traffic when making certain turns.  I don't grasp it all because so many lanes were involved, but will study that more.  OK...now for the part I couldn't wait to tell you.


I got on the next road and notice I'm getting closer to work.  There is red lights about every block I'm driving, but today more were green.  Well, I see a car brake in front of me and notice the light had just turned green. I start slowly rolling forward and suddenly this insanely lucky pedestrian J-walks in front of me and my green light.  He went 3 steps in the road.  I slowed to a stop but he then realized his error and stepped back to the curb.  Oh my gosh yaw, if he only KNEW who was behind that wheel! lol  Maybe my filters got the message across and alerted him to how unfortunate crossing in front of a bioptic user could turn out.  Well today he was lucky and Jennifer was pretty happy I think that I saw it all happen and responded accordingly.  We drove a few more blocks, turned a curb, and I saw my workplace.  Wow, was this for real?  I drove into my workplace parking lot to drop MYSELF off?  I was in shock I guess.  I put the car in park.  Jennifer gave me my bag I stored my bioptics in and said she couldn't believe I was not more excited.  I told her I was just scared.  A scared me is a quiet me.  She was very encouraging about todays testing.  We said goodbye and the workplace security asked where I had been.  I said, you wouldn't believe it, but I drove here!  He laughed and said nope, he didn't believe it.  But he knows I'm using bioptics and helps me watch for the bus each and every day, so he was just teasing.  


I walked back into work with it being the most further thing from my mind.  That's kinda bad since this is a new job.  But who can blame me?  I've waited all my life for this day.   I really had fun learning to drive today despite being a little scared.  Being scared will get you no where.  It's healthy to have some fear, but not to the point it prevents you from accomplishing your goals.  Today fear was put aside with sheer reserved shock and joy.  Every time I drive things should get a little easier.  I can't wait to try it again in a few weeks. 

LEARNERS PERMIT DAY! 12/03/09

My Thursday started off like many others, 5 am alarm, scramble to fix breakfast and a quick check of the weather.  The meteorologist revealed a chance of snow flurries Friday night.  Usually the chance of flurries alone would have me excited, but today was my trip to the DMV.  I had planned ahead as much as possible.  I placed a call Monday to Katie at the Montgomery AL Department of Public Safety to ensure she had all the paperwork she needed, before I showed up at my local DMV.  She said everything was in place and I would just need to bring proper ID.  I asked if I needed any of my bioptic paperwork and she said no.  With that, I packed my social security card, non-drivers license, and money for a cab ride home.


I had asked for about a 6:30 am pick up. The para-transit bus showed up at 7:03 am.  Not bad. This morning some of my colleagues were on the bus.  It was so funny because we ended up going to my workplace to drop them off, but thank God I didn't have to get off the bus there today!  I remained on the bus, making sure my driver knew that work was not my destination today.  She glanced down and said the DMV was on her paperwork.  We arrived around 7:30ish.  The entrance was being repaved,  so I walked through the chilly air to a side door that led to another set of doors.  Then something appeared before me that I thought impossible.


I peered around the corner of the second set of doors and only about 4 people, including one trooper/security officer, were inside!  I have heard countless stories from friends, customers, colleagues, and everyone else about how awful going down there was.  Surely this was just a Department of Motor Vehicles dream I was having.  I approached the old fashioned blocky wooden desk the officer was at.  In front of me was this old lady and a relative of hers.  The lady had some birth certificate issues and the officer asked her to talk to the supervisor with her issue because there is nothing more he could do to help her.  After some coaching and sincere compassion on his part, the officer finally got her out of his hair.  I approached the desk and told him I was there to get my learners permit.  He said that I'd have to show him some ID, including my social security card.  No problem.  He looked at them, wrote a few things down, and handed me a tiny piece of paper and asked I sit in the adjacent room to wait.  I purposely didn't tell him I was a bioptic driver.  I guess I just wanted to get a little further before I alarmed anyone with the news.  That could of been a mistake, but in my case it was not at this stage.  Well, I knew this room the officer sent me to was where the crowd I had missed seeing early on, must be sitting.  I walked further and further to only see the old lady talking to the supervisor and the other person in front of me seated patiently.  This alone was amazing to me.  What was really odd though, was no one but this supervisor was at the desk to the left side of me.

I thought to myself, why didn't I ask if they'd call my number or if I needed to hand it to someone.  Surely that was how it's done....?  right?  I didn't know.  I waited a little longer and looked around contemplating how sad it was that this place looked like a old outdated dump.  Even the sparse Christmas decorations were sickly looking.  Soon a different employee walked in the room and sat at the desk directly in front of my seating area.  I sat patiently holding my ticket out within easy visibility.  Finally she got done sitting up shop and asked me to step to the desk.  Her demeanor was not friendly nor unfriendly.  I later found out she had a cold she was suffering with that likely attributed to her behavior.  I told her I was there to get my learners permit.  I think the first question out of her mouth was if I was a organ donor.  I guess its like credit cards, some things must be pushed by all employees.  For my job, we had to push use of our website.  So I didn't hold it against her.


As the lady officer took my ID's I told her that I was a bioptic driver.  Once this atomic bomb was dropped all bets were off.  She then asked if I had my paperwork.  I said yes.  Even though I was told I would not need it, I brought it anyways.  She glanced at it a little confused and then told me I'd have to have a seat over there until she got some other family out of the way because my processing would take longer then theirs.  So now the DMV nightmare begins right?  Wrong.  I sat thinking the worst because my paperwork was not fully filled out, but I handed her what page was fully filled out hoping for the best.  Well it's about 8 am now and I'm waiting.  I noticed the office traffic is picking up fast.  After the family left her desk, she motioned me back up.  I sat down this time and she began typing while asking me all these questions that they are forced to ask.  She asked things like if I used drugs, had been convicted of a crime or felony, etc etc.  She still looked puzzled by my paperwork.  After confirming my address she told me she'd have to make a phone call.  Well, I heard her talk to her supervisor and the medical office she was trying to reach was unavailable.  With that, I was told to please sit over to the side and she'd be with me just as soon as she reached this medical contact for assistance with my paperwork.  Wow.....now I was really worried.

I sat to the side watching people getting their photo's taken wondering just how long this would end up taking.  Well soon no customers appeared at her desk and she got up to tell me that I was not forgotten.  That was very nice of her.  Now I was warming up to her.  She walked into yet another different side room and I could hear her talking to colleagues.  A few minutes later I thought I heard my last name...but very unsure.  I walked into the room anyways grasping at hope.  The lady officer motioned for me to come sit at yet another desk with her.  It had this very dated looking thing you look through to do the eye test.  In actuality, I think it was hooked to a computer.  I then noticed a small box on the desk where you electronically write your name if you pay for anything.  This was weird how they had modern technology but the facility looked like it had been pummeled by a heard of cattle.  She then she got on the phone and asked for Katie.  Bingo.....this had to be "my Katie" from the Montgomery DMV.  Sure enough it was, I could hear her voice over the phone.  I was elated Katie was at work before 9 am.  I knew things would be okay with my paperwork now.  I asked why Katie told me I needed no paperwork yet I was asked for paperwork.  The lady officer replied the paperwork I had was not helpful anyways and Katie must have been contacted regardless.  Ok, well one mystery solved.  Next she told me that she needed 5 bucks from me to take the learners permit test.  I happily handed it over.  After that was out of the way, she told me to go back into the next room, approach Number 2 Machine, and take my test.  Easy enough.  They were clearly marked kiosk with numbers.  Each kiosk had a little stool in front.  The stool was not at the right height.  Standing wasn't working well either, so I crouched over to see the touch screen machine while partially seated.  Then some commotion started happening behind me.


Perfect timing right?  This woman with a thick English accent who was obviously not originally from the US, began arguing with the officers about her vision problems.  She gave them excuses, she gave them sob stories, everything she could pull out of her hat.  The answer was the same for her:  take yourself to the eye doctor and then come back with some vision aids or glasses.  She finally surrendered.  I was so glad because I could now concentrate more with her gone.  This touch screen kiosk provided us with a sample test option.  I took it.  The first question shows a photo of a horse.  It gives me multiple choices.  Question 1: "Please identify the object in the photo.  Is it:  A: Dog, B: Horse, C: Donkey?"  I pressed B and moved along to my next challenge.....ID a football.  lol  This is insane right?   No wonder such idiots are on the roads!  But this was just the sample test.  Since the sample test was obviously designed to get one used to the format and not the subject matter, I selected the option to begin my 30 question test.


The test did show some of the harder road signs to discern.  The bridge one I did not think would be on the test, was.  There was a question about the point system they use to annotate your driving record and I had to just guess at that one.  There was obvious ones about use of drugs and alcohol mixed.  We had one about changing lanes at intersections, riding behind bicyclist and motorcycles.  There was other give away questions, like identifying stop signs and hand signals.  Sadly, I got confused with the questionable illustration and likely messed up the hand signal question.  There was one about weather seat belts should "fit snugly" around your abdomen or around your hips.  This seemed like a trick.  When I got home and looked in my manual it NEVER specified the answer to this question.  I researched online and found out it was hips and not abdomen.  If you put your seatbelt around your abdomen you risk damage to internal organs in the event of a accident.  There was also questions on what to do during headlight failure and how to treat a bus that is stopped.  Within no time I was done with this much anticipated test.  The touch screen kiosk even has an option to enlarge the photo used on each test question.  Too bad they didn't let you enlarge the font size.  When I completed the last question the machine immediately told me that I passed the test and could report back to the officer for further instructions. 


I was happy that the test was so easy!  It never gave me a precise score.  I guess that is for them to know.  The curious side of me now wishes I would have asked.  I zoomed back over to the office and the lady officer asked me how I did.  I cheerfully told her I passed.  She jokingly replied that I was "cheesin."  Which means I was wearing a huge smile.  I just laughed and told her she was right.  She then asked me to take a photo.  You would know, I did not anticipate this at all.  Who knew learners permits required a photo?  I didn't.  Nor did I recall reading that fact.  Oh yeah, it cost $23.00 here in AL for the learners permit.  I happily had her debit my account.  I wore a hat that morning and had a bad case of hat hair.  Well, nothing I could do about it.  After the photo, she started printing out my temporary learners permit and said I'd get the real one in the mail in about two weeks.  She said that was it.  I glanced at my watch and it was only about 8:30 am.  Amazing!  I thanked her for her trouble and told her she had made my day.  I then called a cab to take me back home.  On the way home the driver got nosy and asked what I was doing at the DMV.  I told him I just got my learners permit.  Imagine his surprise.  He wasn't brave enough to ask why.  :)


So i can't believe it,  I finally got everything accomplished this year that I set out to do.  Jennifer is making some tweaks to my filter cutting, so again I'm waiting on them to be returned.  I discovered during Thanksgiving that no amount of adjusting was allowing me to see through my bioptic fully.  This should be a relatively easy fix.  I'll update you with changes. 

In the meantime.  I hope you enjoy my special Christmas blog and music.  I'm sure I'll be updating you at least once more before Christmas.   Please stay tuned because things are just getting started.

A Little Red Magic

It's official.....I'm seeing RED!  As of 11/10/09 I'm the proud owner of these trendy red filters!  


Jennifer called me on the 11/09/09 and delivered them on the 10th as tropical remains of Ida stumbled through our state.  The first thing I noticed was how she had a hard time getting the bioptic situated inside the filter opening she cut.  Apparently she fixed it so there was only one way to slide my bioptic inside the filter opening.  On my bioptic, I must slide the left side in first.  It's a tight fit.  I was mortified to see this had already scraped my bioptics some.  Even worse, she explained she accidently scratched the red filters when cutting them, so she will have to get another pair for me.  For now I can use these.  I was in a rush to get back to work.  So I briefly tried my bioptic on with the red filter.  We had to loosen the bioptic because I could not see enough through it.  This prompted me to realize my screwdriver was missing out of my bioptic case.  Jenn realized it was in her car and scurried out into the windy weather to fetch it.  I stood quietly in the lobby contemplating what in the world would come out of her mouth next.  I was hoping it was the news I wanted to hear.  But after so many setbacks, I really just forced myself to keep expectations buried.  Now on to the good news.


After a brief minute or two, Jennifer scurried inside with the screwdriver.  She adjusted them standing up, which seemed a bit awkward for her, but non the less, she succeeded in helping me see out of my bioptic more clearly.  It wasn't perfect, but better.  So once we got that settled,  she told me in a matter of fact way that I can go get my permit.  WAIT!   What did she say?  "You can go get your permit" is what I think she said.  My smile said it all.  There it was, all out in the open, the news I had anticipated so long was now a verbal reality.  This made my day, my week, my month!  Jenn then followed up with me about the necessary paperwork that was needed by the State Department of Transportation.  She asked me if I had it,  I said yes.  She explained she'd look for it at her place first and then fax over what's needed before I show up to the DMV for my permit.  That sounded good to me.  Do you know that she actually did it within a days time!  I know she's been busy, but this turnaround time was nothing short of a miracle.  I was shocked to hear from her Wed. morning with news that everything was taken care of with my paperwork.  Wow, kudos to her.  I'm elated at her new zeal to help me.


With all the excitement came the real test, the road.  I took my new filters with bioptic out for a spin with the city transit service.  Wow, they are magic!  These red filters not only made the red lights and break lights jump out at me, it also helped in seeing the street lights at dusk.  Another major bonus is the red filters greatly shield me from the brazen fall sunlight with the broad arm side protection.  It was so good to feel so confident about seeing what was in front of me.  I never ever would have that level of confidence without the red filters.  They are nothing short of amazing.  


So now for the downfall I've noticed.  With my vision, there seems to be a hardship seeing the stop signs with the red filters on.  You'd think they'd jump out at me right?  But this "jumping out"  only occurs with backlit objects, not solid non lit objects.  I actually could see the stop signs better with my own vision.  This troubles me, but I think we can find a workaround.  I also think my bioptic is not fitting correctly in the filters.  I honestly just would rather have the red contacts now that I see how cumbersome the adjusting is of the red filters with the bioptic.  I've seen other states where drivers use red contacts for bioptic driving.  My doctor asked I not do that because I could never see any green lights.  This makes great sense to me.  At least with the bioptic unfiltered I can see green lights.  Red contacts would filter out everything, including sight through my bioptic.  I am working to contact others who use the red contacts to see how their doctors justified them not seeing green lights.  I'll keep you posted on that project.  


So with all the good news and slight mixed results, I'm still overall very happy and may possibly try to get my permit on black Friday.  As promised, the attached photo at the top is of my new red filters and bioptic fitted together.  Let me know what you think.  I should go, time to hit the books and study to get my permit.  Next stop: DMV!

Fall Filters

Finally I have some real news to report!  It's been since June 18th that anything has really happened.  Lots of factors contributed to this slowdown on my end and the professionals helping me through this process.  After not hearing a word from Dr. DeCarlo's office in over 4 weeks, I started calling....daily.  She got in touch with my driving instructor, Jennifer.  Jenn left me a voice mail last week to pick a sunny day to drive.  Well after some phone and email chase we finally nailed down today for her to test me as a passenger with the red filters.  The goal was to see how well I could see the red lights and stop signs while using the new filters.

I was wearing a generic fitting pair of red filters, so it was awkward at first.  Jenn made some adjustments to my bioptic and kindly taped them together with the generic red filters.  After we got them all taped together, it was test time.  It was very bright out today, so I was a little apprehensive.  Plus, I'd not worn the red filters but once on June 18th, so I had to get used to them again.  Let me explain more about how the red filters work so you'll know what I mean.

A little background about me: with my regular vision I can't see red "lights' in daylight hours unless I open my eyes extremely wide.  Since one can only do that so long, it's not a suitable long term option.  With my regular vision, red lights during sunny hours appear to be turned off;  aka...black.  The red filters actually make any red light JUMP out at me just by magnifying its vibrant color.  The thing you probably don't realize is red filters, filter OUT green.  So the green lights appear black!  Ok don't freak out yet.  The good news is the filters do NOT cover the tiny hole in my bioptic that is unfiltered.  Therefore:  I can see the green lights just by peeking in my bioptic for a split second.  I can see the red lights by using my normal vision and looking through the red filters.  The red filters also seem to work well making the yellow lights jump out.

Jennifer began asking me what color the lights were.  I was a little confused at first having to kind of think backwards.
1. If the light in my normal vision using red filters appears black: then in reality it is green.  I will see black through my filters and green through my bioptic.
2. If the light in my normal vision using red filters appears to be vibrantly on, then in reality it is red.  I will see vibrant red through my filters and and black through my bioptic.

Now if that makes any kind of sense to you, please pat yourself on the back and grab a energy drink.

I was able to easily distinguish how many tail lights were on a car, when they were blinking, and when they were solid.  The stop signs were a little harder to see with the red filter then just using my regular unfiltered vision through the bioptic.  Jennifer seemed pretty relieved with this new revelation.  She could now feel safer with me. She admitted she was confused, given my old erroneous diagnosis, why I had trouble with the red lights.  Now that Dr. DeCarlo gave me a accurate diagnosis it all makes sense.  Another great thing about these red filters is they wrap around the sides of my face blocking out bright side lights.  This greatly enhances my ability to drive safely during the day.  However, the safest time for me to drive will be night.  I would not need the filters at night and could just use my bioptic.

After riding around for about 30 minutes Jennifer dropped me back off at work.  She told me she would have to now take my bioptic back to the office to make sure the cut of my new permanent red filters is an exact fit to my bioptic.  So with that, I was very pleased with today's progress.  I was also thankful that the journey didn't end before I ever got to get in the drivers seat!  Keep in mind I'm still doing passenger vision testing.  I have not ever touched the car.  Now that I've tested multiple times as a passenger with the bioptics, and we've seemed to conquer my color vision problems on this passenger test, the next step should be to get my permit.  I'll let you know when I get my red filters.  I'm going to send photos on my next post of them so you'll finally see what I'm talking about with your own two eyes.

Yield Signs

Finally I have managed to get my blog up to date. I found it difficult to post stuff in a timely manner because I started making this blog a month or so after the whole process started. It's been a while since the last update because my work life has eaten up my personal life. I'm sure a lot of you can relate to that. For those of you who don't know, I'm in a 7 month training course for a new job. It's intense and has really pulled me away from my bioptic training. It doesn't help that my driving instructor seems to have forgotten I exist. The good news is, I'm still hoping to squeeze a few driving goals in this year. I still haven't got fitted for my red filters, nor have I taken the major step of getting my permit. These 2 things I hope to complete by the new year so in Jan. or Feb. I'll be ready to really take to the road. I''m praying for God's guidance in all these matters because everything in my life seems uncertain right now. From my living circumstances, to my relationships, to this job training, to my bioptic venture, it is all in the air. Good thing God has control because I couldn't juggle all this alone. I'll keep you updated.

My Red Tail Tale: 06/18/09

I've been waiting since 04/24/09 for this appointment with Dr DeCarlo. If you recall from my last passenger evaluation Jennifer recommended I see my Dr. to get help seeing red lights during daylight hours. I came into the office that day with my bioptics ready to see what she could do. I ended up starting my visit by having her newest apprentice observe my vision with and without bioptic use. She was very pleasant and we easily found common ground to talk about. Too bad though, I think she's married. I should have used my bioptic to scope out a ring. Anyways, after testing and some interesting chatter, Dr DeCarlo waltzed in with her usual calm, well put together demeanor. She and I reviewed what Jennifer told me. But it was not until this point I knew that Jennifer told her she was "scared" to ride with me because I wasn't seeing red lights well in day. This seemed out of character for someone who works with visually impaired people for a living. I think communication there could be misconstrued, so I dismissed it. Of course, the very next thing my Dr tells me is that if this doesn't work, we can't continue. This is something I thought about , but her putting lip service to my thought pierced my soul. Why had I not worried about this more before my visit? I assumed I could at least drive at night. The problem with my assumption is I must still pass the drivers test during the day. Oooops.

Dr DeCarlo explained that she had successfully fitted a patient who had similar color vision problems with these red filters. She then really boosted my spirits when she told me this person is driving with them now. I became elated again. However, my test was yet to come. No one knew if the red filters would work or not. My Dr found a little flashlight type device and asked me what i saw. Then she gave me the red filters to try. This flashlight had several spots, or sources of light. My job was to ID which light sources were in use at a particular time. Dr DeCarlo quickly learned more about what colors I had a problem with. She told me the ironic thing is the red filters block out the green light, yet enhance any red lights. So how would I see traffic lights that are green? Simple. I will look through the unfiltered bioptic for green lights. OK, so it may not be so simple to you, if you are a trained driver, but I'm all new to this, so it's a trivial matter. I really could not gage how well the filters worked inside her office. She said the red filters seemed like the natural next step for me, but there's no better test then the real thing. What is the real thing?

The real thing is the test using the filters outdoors to see red lights and tail lights. This was my absolute last chance. I wanted to do whatever it took to make these things work for me. But ultimately God was going to decide, as He always has, exactly how well this would or would not work. The closer we got to the bottom floor of the Eye Center the more nervous I was. The doctor did not go with me, she sent her apprentice. I know we all must learn at some point, so I followed her every instruction. We joked that she was so new she was not too familiar with the area my Dr. told her to take me to. So about 4:30 that Thursday the bright sun greeted us for the test that had the potential to change my life. So simple, yet so important. I was really facing a lifelong enemy: harsh sunlight.

Dr DeCarlo's assistant asked me to first look for a traffic light. I stepped to the edge of the street that was lined with parked cars to peer up at the light. I only saw part of it. I looked into the distance wondering why it was not changing colors. It looked like it never turned green. She asked what I saw. I told her it the light seemed red but never turned green. Then I realized I was looking at the orange back part of the traffic light not the front of the light. Where was the one she was seeing? I peered back noticing she was not standing at my angle. Then walking closer to her we realized the tree in front of me was hanging over the light. She could see it from her angle but the traffic light was completely obscured by the tree silhouette from my angle! What a RELIEF! I was so scared it wasn't working. Now I had a second chance.

Then it happened. The green light changed to red and I could see the red light so intensely magnified. It was like magic glasses. The red just jumped out at me, no longer blending in during harsh daylight. I was elated. Then the assistant asked me to look the other direction.....no problem, I could see them very easily. We needed more test. So she had me monitor the red tail light on a car that just passed us. She asked me if it was blinking or solid. I could clearly see when it stopped and stared blinking without any hesitation! This is incredible! Then we spotted cars further away and she put me through additional similar testing. She could see how excited I was. Even more awesome, I did not get ONE test wrong. Dr DeCarlo appeared on the street after about 10 minutes to check our progress. Her assistant told her I was batting a million!

The three of us walked back inside, where Dr DeCarlo called my driving instructor Jennifer, who was along everyone else, happy to hear that this last crucial effort worked. Now my big question is how will I wear these AND my bioptics. The answer: Dr DeCarlo says Jennifer and her can arrange to have a hole cut in the red filters large enough to have the bioptic fit though. That way one pair can be worn over the other. Another great advantage for me is the red filters offer much more sun protection then the regular sunlight filter Ocutech provided with my bioptics. The red filters have SIDE sunlight protection too. Now on to the next step: bioptic passenger testing with my new red filters. I can't wait!

My New Diagnosis: Cone Dystrophy: 04/30/09

I was not on pins and needles too long before Dr De Carlo called me with the Electroretinogram results. I got a voicemail saying she could not leave this information on the phone and must reach me directly to discuss my case. I understood her ethics but lamented some about the phone tag. I got off work and still no call. I sat waiting on the bus while staring at my phone as if that would help it ring. I checked the volume because I mute it out of habit at work. I checked the battery. I checked the voicemail. Finally at the very late end to my doctor's exhausting work day I got the call! My bus still had not arrived so I talked to her with quiet enthusiasm in my employer's lobby.

She told me I have what she suspected: Cone Dystrophy

Dr De Carlo stated by doing this electroretinogram test we ruled out the possibility of other optical diagnosis. I asked her several questions about the symptoms. It all added up! I have light sensitivity problems during daylight hours, I can see well at night, I have color blindness, and I have problems seeing fine details. She was so professional and kind. She assured me that the diagnosis itself would not hinder my pursuit to be a bioptic driver. I was relived. The thought had actually never crossed my mind. I never once thought she may find something that will inhibit my ability to try bioptic driving. She went on to tell me that cone dystrophy can be genetic. She said that more family background may help shed light on this issue. She said there's no cure at this time as it's all a brain centered problem. But, with more advanced genetic research there is hope.

Another thing I learned during our conversation was that if it was inherited there is a 50 percent chance I will pass this on to my children. Scary.....I never EVER thought about this...I know I want kids, but would this prevent me from having any with my DNA? The short answer is NO. I believe in God before science. Plus, if I can do this, I'd have no problems teaching my kids to deal with it. Science is good, God is greater. He has a plan for each and every one of us from conception to infinity. If He want's me to have a child I will.

If you remember, in the previous blog about my "2nd Passenger Evaluation," I said that my only hope is to see if my doctor can give me tools to see red lights better in the daylight hours. I also stated that Dr. De Carlo's office had no appointment till June 18th. We touched on this subject and she graciously and sincerely apologized for the long wait to see her again. I told her it's no big deal, I've waited 30 years to do this, what's a few more months of waiting going to matter? haha So the waiting begins......again.....for the next exam and my last hope of continuing this dream. I pray it is not the end.

BY THE WAY:

If you want to learn more about what Cone Dystrophy is check out this link: Cone Dystrophy

A Possible New & Improved Bioptic Design

Click here to check out the newest possible bioptic design : Bioptics

2nd Passenger Evaluation: 04/24/09 I'm Crushed

My neighbor and friends have been working a lot with me this past week to prepare me for today. I still don't think I'm an ideal bioptic user, but I should pass. Today Jennifer was kind enough to arrange to pick me up form work with another one of her pupils. This Friday was a bright sunshine filled day. I hurried to get downstairs from work to meet Jennifer at the curb of my workplace. She called my cell and said one of the girls she was training had put her a little behind and someone was lost in her building. I told her no problem, I had no choice but to wait. :) After about 10 minutes she arrived. I had no idea what vehicle she was in. I forgot to ask. When she finally arrived she rolled down the window and said my name as I cautiously approached the van.

She was joking and called the van her new soccer mom mini van. Apparently, her employer had just given it to her to use for testing. Jenn introduced me to the teenage driver she was working with. Jennifer mostly talked and had a few cell phone distractions. It was obviously not a ideal day for her to do this test. She did ask me to spot a few things here and there. At one point we braked and she asked me if the car in front of us had blinking lights on or not. I had no clue, it was very bright and the bright light makes red light very hard to see. I can only see red perfectly at dusk or night. We tried a few other vehicles. No luck. With that, she was starting to get a negative tone with me about my driving prospects. I had mentioned moving to Oregon, and she said her sister lived there and I'd be a much better off there. That really did not make me happy, but she meant to be encouraging. I realized that, but this is NOT what I wanted to hear today! I was at my house before I could blink an eye. She apologized for not having enough time to test me more in depth today. I had to prompt her for information at the end of our trip. She told me what to work on and then gave me a little hope.

Jennifer explained that Dr. De Carlo has some options for users with problems seeing red lights. She mentioned some contacts and filters. She then told me that I should not contact her until I've seen Dr. De Carlo again for assistance correcting these problems. With that she was off, and I was left home alone on a early Friday afternoon to do nothing but ponder this unfortunate turn of events. I was CRUSHED!!! And the news gets worse from there. Monday I called the doctors office to setup this appointment Jennifer required. I was told by the secretary that it would be almost 2 months before I could see Dr. De Carlo again due to her extensive research and limited patient schedule! I took the next appointment: June 18th. This really sucks. I think it could be the end. Me going back to the doctor at Jennifer's request, sounds like a last straw effort. I'm in shock and frustrated beyond belief. I'm seeing red now...because I'm so mad, too bad I still can't see the red stop lights that well. I knew this may happen, I just don't want it to be over.